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License to Kill

Year: 1989
Studio: United Artists
Director: John Glen
Producer: Robert G Wilson/Albert Broccoli
Writer: Ian Fleming
Cast: Timothy Dalton, Robert Davi, Wayne Newton, Benicio Del Toro, Everett McGill, Desmond Llewellyn
The stupid one, when longtime Bond director John Glen got to the Goldeneye stage, deciding to do something radically different and turning Bond in a mincing, whining ladyboy. He also wasn't helped by the mincing ladyboy Timothy Dalton. I don't care how many Ian Fleming purists say he was most like the Bond of the books, he was the worst one on the screen.

It's stupid because they to tap into the American audience favourite of having the benevolent power turn out to be a bloated, unwieldy, corrupt institution that the hero has to break ties with to get The Job Done.

One of the hallmarks of Bond is that he loves the service and does what he does to serve Queen and country. Having him run off and go rogue turns him into a tuxedoed Rambo and it just doesn't work. Bond's also not that principled and passionate that he'd quit and go on the run to help friends. His passions amount to Vodka martinis and hot chicks, not I Will Survive-style gestures of independence.

Felix is captured by drug lord Robert Davi, who kidnaps him at his wedding and lowers him into a poll full of sharks (at least they got one Bond institution right). It's ridiculous enough that Felix survives, waking up like he's just been under with a bad flu rather than half eaten by sharks, but James gives him such a 'I'll get them, I promise' he might as well stick his tongue in before telling M he's resigning and doing it himself if MI6 won't do anything to bring Felix's attacker to justice.

After that I switched off (in my brain if not the video) and the rest of it is presumably too little, too late.

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