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Sharktopus

Year: 2010
Studio: Syfy
Director: Declan O'Brien
Producer: Roger Corman
Writer: Mike MacLean
Cast: Eric Roberts, Ralph Garman, Sara Malakul Lane, Héctor Jiménez

I thought I'd seen the worst film ever from the straight to video schlock canon a few weeks back with Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, but boy was I wrong.

Everything about this movie is so astoundingly and unashamedly bad it boggles the mind, from Eric Roberts' working-for-lunch-money performance to the logic behind every point in the story. It's not only a shark crossed with an octopus, it can walk around on shore using its tentacles.

Going straight for a 'Roger Corman in the CGI age' mood (not a co-incidence either, as the godfather of camp and cheap produced it), the writer and director leave just one question hanging – was it meant to be laughably bad, or just plain bad? It's both in equal measure.

An industrialist (Roberts) has created a hybrid shark/octopus for the US Navy. During a close encounter with a boat, the electronic collar it wears that gives them control over it is dislodged and the beast is loose.

Several lines in the film allude to it not just being hungry but killing because it's some sort of aquatic Freddy Krueger and it dispatches one victim after another with over-acted, badly computer-rendered gusto until the square jawed hero and plucky heroine – neither of whom can act – track it down and exact any number of useless plans involving amazing coincidences.

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